God's Child, Our Joy

An adoptive family's journey in faith and life

30 August 2012


The week starts Sunday night, and ends on the weekend with our planned date night Friday night, and weekend trip to the pool with Eva. We just need to make it to the weekend without any shenanigans.

In an unusual moment Sunday night, we had some free time to get done some things that had been piling on the kitchen table. Thank yous, packaging up a gift for my brother’s birthday and pictures for our birthmother. The other thing was writing out a thank you to our adoption agency for all the work that they had done for us. It was long and sappy, but we meant every word of it.

Monday I ran to the post office and sent it all out. This was our second attempt at sending pictures out to our birthmother. The first time they came back to us, and when we messaged her later she let us know that her current address was “complicated”. We hoped that she’d get them this time, and we wouldn’t receive a phone call later about them not showing.

Tuesday, we had the TV on TLC after she went to bed, a 19 Kids and Counting marathon was running. We tried to figure out the difference in age for the kids. At any moment in that family, someone is going through a new development, and somehow they pull it all off even though those kids are so close in age. It’s quite amazing.

By this night, we’ve already started to throw out the pool trip on the weekend. Through no fault of our own (except for maybe that aerosol can of hair spray I used junior high), Hurricane Isaac is dumping on Louisiana and neighbors, and is projected to roll over us on the weekend. This inconvenient coincidence of events has been tough, but the week will get easier.

Wednesday continued Eva’s amazing run of developments. First she learned how to sit(link sit), then to pull herself up, and then started babbling. Wednesday she crawled. This Wednesday the 29th was Quinton’s birthday, number 9 or 56 in dog years, yes? He received a new toy, which he immediately started working at to pull out the stuffing.

We have a girl who just learned to crawl, and loves to put whatever she can into her mouth. We have a dog that tears apart his toy and leaves stuffing all around the room. This inconvenient coincidence of events has been tough, but the week will get easier.

Thursday the 30th Steph picked up Eva from daycare that day, and brought her home in a different outfit than she had arrived in. She appeared to have caught some bug, and had filled a number of diapers throughout the day. This day was not going to be an easy one.

I came home to a sleeping child, a wore out and sick as well wife, and a dog that was feeling his new age. He was wore out as well, tired by Eva’s newfound ability to crawl and lunge for his tail whenever he let his guard down. Begging for food was no longer a stationary task.

So Steph is ill, and Eva is ill. This inconvenient coincidence of events has been tough, but the week will get easier.

I checked my e-mail and saw one from our agency. They asked us to call them back. Earlier in the day, Steph received a call from our adoption agency. They had asked if we would be references for them. No doubt they called about the reference, probably verifying some details or asking if they can quote us. I called back and left a message. We waited a while for them to call back, but after an hour we determined it wasn’t urgent.

We gently woke Eva to feed her a bottle. Got to keep her hydrated. After that, we put our happy but drained girl to bed for the night. Steph headed to bed not terribly much later since she wasn’t feeling the best either.

Then our agency called.

I was right with a couple of my guesses. She did ask if she could quote us from our thank you note, and what she asked wasn’t urgent, as in she didn’t need to know immediately. But what she asked was that question we had in the back of our heads, but didn’t want it to be true yet.

Gweneth (our birthmother’s psuedo name) was pregnant again, due in March. Would we consider adopting this baby as well?

So much for date night.

Only just days before after watching 19 Kids I had considered in my mind if a year and a half was too short between children. This would be 15 months. Should we do it? Can we do it? What does God have planned for us? This week of coincidences has reached a new apex. Now I have to go wake up my ailing wife to tell her the news. If she gets to sleep before 2 am, it will be a miracle. The bigger miracle will be making a decision that will change the rest of our lives with a clear mind, and a clear heart.

God, is it too much to ask that this decision is made clearer than our decision on buying a Blu-Ray player? Is it too much ask that we know why today my heart is bigger than my mind, and Steph’s mind is overruling her heart? Is it too much to ask that visa-versa wouldn’t be true just a few hours later? Can you let us know why one of the most important decisions we could make is being made by two people that are either exhausted, sick or both, distracted by feats of Eva’s development and prevention of stuffing intake, who are preparing for a storm to pass and haven’t yet decided if they are ready for more children?

After hours of discussing pros/cons (future post), I passed out for the night. I remained very calm, and tried not to lean either way. I felt that I would pray and hope for guidance. Picture any movie where the character pleads to God for guidance. Only…

Like I said, I passed out. Then morning came, and Eva needed to be fed, a reloaded diaper needed changing, I had to go to work, I had to pick up supplies for the inevitable power outage that comes with storms here, I had to pick up lunch for my sick girls, I had to go back to work, I had to get home to do the yard work before incoming days of rain. I had to do this and that, when would I have time to pray? When would I have time for God to come down in a vision and say Option 1 or Option 2?

My prayers today have been short and sweet. God, help. Please.

We want that moment of clarity, a sign from heaven (is it too much to ask for that one beam of light to shine down and shine on a “Crib Sale” sign?). While I haven’t received that yet, it’s becoming ever more clear that each conversation between Steph and I, between friends, family and co-workers is that conversation between God and us. You have questions about the age difference, here’s your cousin who’s kids are that same difference apart. You want spiritual guidance? Here’s your pastor. You need someone to vent to, here’s your friend.

Now God, one more thing. What do we do?


4 thoughts on “30 August 2012

  1. What HUGE news!! This is incredible!!! If readers get to vote, I vote you say yes to this baby too. You don’t know when you’ll get another chance like this and the kids would be full siblings (which may or may not matter to you one bit). If anyone can do this, it’s your family I just know it. What a blessing. It feels like a gift from above to me. I hope everyone is healthy again over there btw 😉

  2. If we get a say in this (your lovely readers), I say yes! If you have the opportunity to adopt the next one, go for it. I’d say that’s a pretty big sign. Just sayin’.

  3. Scott and Steph…..wow! I cannot even imagine how it felt to hear that news, and on such a weekend as well! I don’t think that anyone else can tell you what to do of course. Please do know that we are praying for you and your family and for guidance for you both to make the best decision for your family. Your hearts are so huge that no matter what decision you make, I’m sure it will be the right one. God Bless you and sweet Eva.

  4. Sending prayers for guidance for you both… I’ve loved reading this blog about your journey. At this risk of making this about me, part of the reason we like the name Joshua for our soon to be boy is the verse “As for me and my house, we shall serve the Lord.” – You and Steph have shown your continued dedication to serving and following God and as a family after God’s own heart.
    Good luck in your discernment. I hope Steph and Eva are feeling better!

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