God's Child, Our Joy

An adoptive family's journey in faith and life

A neutral baby in a pink and blue world.


If you’ve had a child, but didn’t know the gender beforehand, you may know what I’m talking about, but the world (by which I mean Babies ‘R Us and Target) does not understand your genderless existence. We don’t exactly have the choice, well, at least we’ve chosen not to choose. The options for baby stuff falls into five categories, boy, girl, leaning boy, leaning girl, and fine, if you must, neutral.

Depending on your feelings on yellow, there are three colors available for neutral; green, brown and white.  Other colors that would be more neutral but aren’t commonly available in baby are orange, red and black.  Who’s to say I don’t want a goth baby? (“You don’t!” chimes in Steph)

After spending a full afternoon registering for things, we looked at our list.  Many of our neutral options seemed to end up on the leaning boy. They were even labeled “boy.” Not sure what this says, is it more acceptable to dress a girl in blue than a boy in pink?

Registering for stuff as adoption parents is already more difficult. There’s the first question, when? When you’ve made the decision? When you’re approved? When you’ve taken a child home? We did it when we were approved. The negative is that we might have to store things for many months. However, if we waited until we were placed with a child, that would make week one extremely more difficult, and it may not line up with other people’s schedule.  It also makes Steph cringe a bit thinking that we may be unprepared.

Each place you register requires you to fill out a form.   We’ve already discussed the gender issue.  The biggest issue for us is due date.  Some adoptive parents will have due dates if they are matched with a birth mom before birth.  We may be that way, maybe not.  So what do you put?  It seems irrelevant, but there are added benefits for getting it right.  Babies ‘R Us lets you buy things on your list for 10% off if they were not purchased, so it encourages you to add it all to their list.  However, this coupon is not available until your due date and expires after 90 days.

We decided on 31 December.  Not too hopeful, but reasonable. Luckily, the website appears to let you change this date.

Other joys of the registry.  There’s an option to allow people to buy protection plans for the products.  I probably wouldn’t, but whatever, I wouldn’t want to deprive that option.  Now, when you see the product on our list, it says that we have requested the protection plan.  So if you see that, please ignore it.

‘R Us had a check box for “Adopting?”.  It doesn’t work.  Every time we change the answer to yes, it changes it back to no. Thanks!  Also, they listed thank you cards on the things you should register for.   “Here you go, I just kept one for myself.”

Every other issue we had tended to be the same with every parent.  How much clothes do you need?  Did we register for too many musical toys?   Which of the 9000 bottle options is the best for me?

The last note I had was that baby stuff brought out the kid in both of us.  Steph enjoyed all the cute toys, and you can’t walk by a pair of itty bitty shoes without her going “Awww, they’re soo cute!”  I regressed to giggle at words.  Babies favorite balls.  Butt paste.  Seat with vibrator.   Pooh blanket.   He he, pooh.  No one said I had to be the mature one all the time.


2 thoughts on “A neutral baby in a pink and blue world.

  1. when i was starting to read your post, i thought of orange but after you mentioned it, it made me realize how rare it is to find baby stuff in orange. which is a total shame because orange is such a fun and happy color!

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